tonight the lines blur between expectations and reality. your eyes are glazed over and move slightly left and right, you're analyzing the situation. i'm nervous, you've been here before and this is your home court. i look away, i look back, i look at the ground, i know exactly what to say. i pause, i'm imagining i'm looking pretty thoughtful right now. eye contact, the type that with enough kindling could start a fire, my gaze is a magnifying glass, you're an ant. i'm talking to you, my gut and arms are tense, preparation for a sucker punch. i said it, i said it well, i exhale a narrow jet stream through pursed lips.